Dear diary,

Pathetic Pathetic Pathetic!

I slept 4 hours in the afternoon, AGAIN.

It has been 2 months plus which I stayed awake at night and slept the day off. I’m trying to be discipline about sleeping before 12 midnight instead of 3am. But I’m gonna fail to do so today because I just slept the afternoon away.

It’s really all about the DISCIPLINE. I really can’t stand but to sleep…I’m so tired in the afternoon, especially after my piano lesson today.

Well today it’s Impromptu speech evaluation. Got a couple of good comments yet also some improvements to be made for my speech. I’m more than satisfied for my marks because I thought I screwed.

Through all the learning in life (be it piano, latin, softwares, language etc) I learned 2 very crucial principles which is CONFIDENCE and DISCIPLINE.

It’s easier said than done, but I need to constantly remind myself of that, especially the CONFIDENCE part. I tried it today during my piano lesson. I kept telling myself that I can do it, and it does magics. I learned faster and it’s the mind-set that matters. Guess what?! Even Passion comes from Confidence. Same goes for driving, that’s how I sharpen my skills into what i have today and I’m still learning.

Dear diary,

Today it’s Tuesday. As usual, I went to my Latin class. Today’s the final lesson for Rumba, next week we’re gonna move on to Samba.

I’m struggling to learn the best steps, best gestures…everything. Am I wanting too much? I think so. But I can’t even do the basics properly. I hope Therese can polish my flaws but I think that’s not gonna happen. I need more than polish, i need a partner. I’m so darn down now. I hope it’s holiday now and so I can use up all my free time to practice.

Well it’s a down down day…

Dear diary,

I’m brain-storming ideas for my web assignment. Found that I actually love this process quite a lot! I enjoyed the freModerate Commentsedom of thoughts, pulling everything out, sketching the thoughts on papers, colour pencils scattered all over my workspace…this is the flare that I need – I love beautiful things! Work’s getting fun especially with a mod music as my background piece plus the cold breezy weather: 26 degree celsius.

At least….this process is much lovable than all the scripting and troubleshooting of the flash outputs…it’s like my nightmare.

I’ve slept my evening away…ate a couple of Sushi for dinner – bought from Cold Storage. and stomach don’t feel so well after that, I suppose the sushi are not too fresh. But, feelin’ OK already now.

Well, it’s 2am and I’m gonna catch my series on WLT.

Dear diary,

I’m EVERYWHERE. I can’t focus.

It’s 26 degrees celcius outside = cold night.

I need to settle down; come out with a to-do list and start completing the tasks.

Time Management is crucial, I truly believe on this statement.

I feel like publicizing my blog i.e. posting the address to my MSN’s PM and friendster page. but should I? Can anyone give me some suggestions about this?

Saturday 晴 2:26am

Dear diary,

Today’s SHOPPING day. Shopped too much I supposed. I’m broke. I meant it this time.

Morning – a dear friend came over and we chatted for hours! but i don’t feel time flowing by at all…is that a good sign? *giggles*, I suppose ya.

Afternoon – Strolled from my home to PJ – shopped in Amour – then from PJ to Subang to get my 6 pieces of altered dresses and then from Subang to The Curve. On the way from Subang to PJ, the sun is setting, it was beautiful! I feel like I’m at the beach. I hope I am.

Evening – Dinner in IKEA. Meatballs are not for sale today, disappointed! Went for Lemon Herb Chicken. Next stop is The Soya Shop – Lotus Glutinous Riceballs. Then Big Apple’s Donut – I chose the Peanut Butter flavour kind of thing… we sat at “the street” and i whacked my donut right there. At the same time, indulging in the live band performance of oldies, good atmosphere, peaceful, relaxing yet not alone. it’s a quadruplet combi of 1 violin, 1 cello, 2 guitars.

Last stop was Borders…I got some dance music.

Great Saturday – great shopping experience – great companion although they’re not as ’shop-a-ho-lic’ as I am. but at least i’m not alone.

I spent a lot and i’m feeling bad about it right now. However, I think nobody has the right to ‘control’ or even give a command about my expenses besides my parents. Well, you can probably advice me on that but be it in a polite manner. Yes I’m a shopaholic but I shop for a reason. and I think there’s no need for me to explain just for the sake of defending my ‘image’.

I remained silence, that’s why you don’t see how bad I feel about my cash-flow. A true friend at this time will convince me of how can my cash-flow bring me happiness (yes, a few did) but not being offensive of how much cash-flow i ‘just’ afforded.

I’m just pissed right now. a good day turns bad eventually.

Wednesday 阴 9:26pm

Dear diary,

This break up caused me to lost certain amount of respect from people around me. I rather I never be in a relationship before, I rather I’m always that girl with my own unique identity. I want people to recall me as : oh tht single girl which have all things done perfectly herself. However, I believe that I can plant this identity back to myself shortly and will not lost it easily anymore. It’s just the matter of time.

I’ve a whole list of tasks to be accomplished in my life. Be it my short term or long term goals. Although seemingly free with 2 free days in a week, I feel breathless because there are too much to learn in life and I’m wanting more and more each time. I think it’s time to prioritize the tasks and manage my time accordingly. I can’t full-fill everything but I can pick some to be full-filled.

All of a sudden, I miss everything from the past.
I miss my childhood maid;
I miss one dead friendship;
I miss my enthusiasm;
I miss my sis;
I miss my previous house;
I miss my previous hair;
I miss my holiday;
I miss high school;
I miss you.

however, those are all past tense and can only be remained as memories, except for the sis part which I can look forward to. moving forward is what matters now.

Wednesday 阴 12:22pm

I overslept and woke up on 8.30am. Holly~! Class starts on 8.30am and I’m still in my pyjamas!

Anyway, still manage to reach uni on 9am despite the heavy jam.

I kinda miss you lately… although I hate you very much; but I really miss you.

I wonder will you feel the same about me? Or am I a total failure that have totally disappeared from your mind already… I’ve no idea. I don’t wanna know.

Dear diary,

Today’s not really a good day except for the evening part.

Grouping always cause problems. Can’t it be less complicated? I’m so tired of all those.

Latin was great! Getting better indeed! We’ve finished learning the Rumba basic steps and basically, hopefully, we’re able to dance with any Rumba piece. Passion Drives Strength.

Dear diary,

I’ve spent my Sunday in USJ, visiting my grannies. My mom gotta settle some investments stuff with my aunties. That’s the whole main purpose.

I polished my nails and put on some new pink coat to my toes. Had dinner there too…and went to Pyramid II. Nice architecture with a lot of lights…looked huge but not ‘a lot of shops’ inside. Perhaps it’s not fully-opened yet. Well, so me and mummy shopped for groceries in Jusco – loaded the stuff into the car – and we go get a drink in Halo Cafe around 11pm something. Feels different yet great to do the ‘friend’ thing with mummy! I ordered a Tiger Draught and seasoned fries. The male singer is darn cute!! Nice hair; sexy eyes; great voice plus he knows how to play the piano!

me and my Tiger in Halo Cafe

Another portion of the new Pyramid building…

Pyramid II – the brand new building. Looks ok huh?!

Dear diary,

It’s Saturday night. Since it’s the 1st week of the semester plus all the weekday blues I’ve gone through, I allow myself to have the weekend ‘my way’. I realized that it’s not about who you’re going out with, but it’s all about the experience out there. I thought after the break up, I wouldn’t have any more new photos coming into my scrapbook; I thought that I can’t have wonderful weekends anymore; but the fact is, I still can have those because it all lies in me; not anybody else.

I had my dinner in Paddington House of Pancakes, One-Utama. love the architecture made up of glass! modernity rules.

I ordered this thing called “Armsterdam“. It’s a combi of
beef salami, button mushrooms, cheese and tomatoes etc.
It tastes quite good! Rich and filling.
Beverage: Fizzy Mango = a twist of Orange and Mango.

I bought a wall clock from Presents4them, one of my fav shop. Well so from today onwards, this will be the 1st thing I’m gonna look at every single morning.

Before midnight, I went to Eye On Malaysia.

Blue looks nice!

…but I like pink better!

The city is sparkling…