Dear diary,

It’s Friday, 5.12am.

My flash web site assignment is submitted.

I felt relieved but stoned.

Too many busy nights and suddenly one free night. And that explains my disappearance here for a week and so.

The process of getting the flash site done is never easy. Luckily I have attentive & cooperative groupies and no other priorities while moving towards the deadline. Whenever there’s a problem, it’s more like a team problem, that helps cut down individual responsibility and helps maintain the passion and energy level.

I remember ourselves working on the softwares over an obvious time lapse. We moved from UNI to STARBUCKS to A FRIEND’s HOME. From day till night. just for the sake of the internet connection and each other’s company. I would described that as a fun experience but would be better if I get to bath halfway or what. However one of the best part is, we ordered McD delivery while we were in Uni. That’s our lunch at 6pm.

McD
busy at work…

Sunset picture i took while waiting for Mcd to arrive.

I would definitely miss this process although it’s hectic and tiring. Anyway, the hard work pays off because I learned new skills. At the beginning of this semester, I’m a total dummy towards Macromedia Flash. I learned it from scratch, all by myself, based on books, online tutorials etc. Before this I felt insecure.but now i think the fear was unnecessary. It is possible to learn anything as long as there’s persistence and a strong will. You’ll excel if there’s passion. I’ll hold on tight to this believe in whatever i’m gonna do with my life later on.

This semester is coming to an end. I feel heavy-hearted. I just don’t want it to end because i enjoyed it really much. especially the part of my demonstrative speech. We demonstrated how to make tequila cocktails. 4 of us demonstrated Tequila Sour, Tequila Sunrise, Peach Tequila and Viva Villa. And I’m responsible for demonstrating Tequila Sunrise. I didnt’ know that cocktails can taste that good! because we all have passion about it, that’s why we excel.

I need to redirect my life. it’s in a mess. my room is in a mess too. my goals are vague all of a sudden and i’m slacking most of my time off.

since it’s 5.12am edi now.i better pop into bed.coz there’s class on 8.30am tomorrow.

Dear diary,

I’m mentally and physically exhausted. It’s 1.30am. I just took my bath.

I feel like i’m gonna fall sick. I need to stop that from happening. i can’t afford to fall sick.

Dear diary,

I’m exhausted and I mean it. I can hardly open my eyes now.

oh by the way it’s 3.13pm. after class. i’m pitching my speech for tomorrow’s demonstrative.

hope everything turns out fine!

wish me luck.

Dear diary,

I’m exhausted. I slept from 6.30pm till 9pm. After dinner-ing (which mom take-away from “Dave’s” – delicious Indian servings) and chatting and skepe-ing and face-booking and friendster-ing and gmail-ing, it’s already 10:40pm now. I better begin my revision for tomorrow’s mid term before it’s too late.

Another subject that i love studyin’ – public speaking. there’s a lot to gain from the notes.

i hope i can focus!

if i can finish at least 5 set of notes before 1am then i’ll reward myself a coke from the fridge.

cheers~

current soundtrack: music from Kire’s blog.

Dear diary,

A friend just send some big apple donuts over to me!

i’m amazed! and ate up 2 at one go despite just finishing my dinner.

but i dislike black sesame. so one donut is left in the fridge.

Dear diary,

i’m enjoying tons of good music!

it doesn’t needs to be new to be good;
it doesn’t needs to be popular to be good;
it just needs myself feeling that it’s good then it’s good.

“why should human always live to please the other people?”

the fact is, you control your own life and everything you do, you do it for the sake of yourself.

“Owning a car because you really need it but not to show-off. having an expensive laptop with good specs because you appreciate the specs and you know exactly how it can make your life better. having beautiful clothes because you appreciate the magic done by the clothes to you.”

nothing is free in this world. what you see is not what you get. so take a break judging! try envying the good things in your own life instead.

As for the people who love to talk about you; judge you; criticize every single thing about you. (pause) think twice, don’t you think they’re bossy and have nothing better to do? (pause) try thinking again, don’t you feel that they’re somebody that’s absolutely discontented ? in other words, they’re nobody!

the next minute, when you try recalling who that person is, the only thing that pop into your mind could be …”erh…i don’t even know who that person is!”

in short, they don’t know what they want; they don’t know what they love;
or sounding more pathetic, they don’t even have a life!

so what’s the use of whining about these people? isn’t it gonna be better to use up all your energy to improve yourself and know yourself more?!

explore your life, keep looking for new things. because you won’t know there’s something out there that might one day become your new interest! life is vibrant, exciting, dimensional. and you wouldn’t wanna miss out the good bits, do you? however, good bits usually come after the bad ones. and it needs to be worked for.

hence, it’s time to switch your priority in life a little. don’t let these boastful people become your priority and you’ll find yourself moving on greatly in life!

Dear diary,

At this time of the night, I’m studying for Multimedia Broadcasting Mid-term test. Simply because I didn’t study earlier. and i am regretful about it right now.

However, i’m trying to enjoy the content of what I’m studying. it’s fun! especially typography. I study as if i’m reading a storybook, holding on to the attitude of wanting to know more. It’s something related to technology and i love anything tech-savvy.

i think technology is a something brilliant. anyone who is good at it must at least have a certain level of intelligence. Because you need some IQ in order to understand how it functions. different from bio; it’s all about logics and the cause-and-effect phenomenon.

Dear diary,

I’ve updated the post “Feast” – added pics into it.

My mom turns 57 on 13.11. But with her wearing the blouse that I gave her as a present, I think she looks like 25?! hehe. Don’t you think so? she said it’s not her style but she’s willing to accept this new style coz it makes her look beautiful!

My Supermom. i.e. the person that I admire the most.
She gave me strength, courage and lessons of life.
She thought me a lot through sharing her 30+ years of
working experiences with me every single day.
She borrow me her motivational books and wants me to enrich myself with all the knowledge.
She proved to me that dreams can be realized because she
constantly achieve her dreams despite her growing age.
She’s positive.
She cooks my favourite meals and makes me look forward to dinner time every single night.
She trains me to be independent and responsible of my own life.
(esp financially, she thought me to think big; get big; take risks whenever needed to. Staying in the comfort zone won’t take you anywhere. It only makes you forever there).
She loves me, i knew it.
She forgives me everytime i made a mistake because she
believes that i’ll learn from my mistakes.

She’s the best thing i could ever have in my life.
i love you mummy.

Sis, you could have completed this picture!

Dear diary,

Today is a Thursday with only one class in the afternoon. And that one class is reserved for our consultation with multimedia tutor regarding the flash website progress. I don’t even wanna think about it (flash). It makes me depress. I meant it. I rater do any other assignment instead of this. It’s killing me softly.

Anyway, putting aside the blardy flash. i decided to slack off my evening, indulging in my KFC and TV. and in a blink of instance, it’s already 9.30pm. i think i’ve just slacked off too much of my time. Am i suppose to…? I’m guilty now!

I’m just not disciplined enough, sometimes. but, please tell me that i deserve it and i’ll feel better.

Multimedia mid term is 24 hrs ++ away. I gotta begin…at least sorting out my notes.

Dear diary,

For 11hours straight, I’ve been burying myself completely in the complicated world of logics. The only stop I’ve made is for my dinner. I think I need some time-off. Well my mind needs it but my heart doesn’t allow it.

Why? Why mouse-over buttons are so inflexible?! Why can’t Flash just programme the logics into button clicks of function?

I so wanna invent a new simplified flash software. Only if I know how to write programmes.

Kill me please.